To be happy, we must admit women and men aren’t ‘equal’ Norman Vincent Peale, author of “The Power of Positive Thinking,” once wrote these words: “Change your thoughts, and you change your world.”

His statement is highlighted at the beginning of my new book, “How to Choose a Husband and Make Peace with Marriage.” Its premise is that if women want to be successful in love, they should reject the cultural script they’ve been sold and adopt a whole new view of men and marriage.

As products of divorce, the modern generation has few role models for lasting love. That alone is a problem. But young women have an added burden: they’ve been raised in a society that eschews marriage. They’ve been taught instead to honor sex, singlehood and female empowerment.

Consider this statement by Rebecca Traister in Marie Claire: “The world as we’ve known it for a very long time—one in which a woman’s value was tied to her role as a wife—is ending, right in front of us. It is now standard for a woman to spend years on her own, learning, working, earning, socializing, having sex, and yes, having babies in the manner she—and she alone—sees fit. We are living through the invention of independent female adulthood.”

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Categories: Americas

7 replies

  1. They are equal . But this “equal” has some further explanations. That some minds do not feel comfortable with.

    It is so agonizing that woman that is the core or the nucleus of the family has derailed.Putting the whole system in chaos.To me she has become self obsessed and selfish. And since long she has lost her dignified persona. Instead has become a show piece.She has lost the bliss of quarderwalls. And Paradise that lay in her feet.
    If she lists her losses and gains. She and the society certainly has lost much more then gains.

  2. This pseudo independent (in reality an extreme irresponsible & lunatic) female adulthood now has started to generate following direct and indirect logical consequences.

    1-rapid dwindling birth rates
    2-increasing imbalance of female and male proportion
    3-rising need of immigration & then its collateral impacts such as racism
    4-shifting of life-partner selection tendency among noble gents by importing from 3rd world countries
    5-increased homosexuality among females not by choice but ….
    6-Social aloofness among women after age of 35-40 years. More and more women after that period of age start to get alone even having a thriving so-called professional and social life. That is not the case with men. Increasing mental and psychological problems
    7-Decreading desire among women to be a good mother hence to act responsible toward building a healthy society, consequently more more irresponsible generation coming up.

    In view of above realistic but horrific results we see that its women who are losing more and more each day with this nonsense independent female adulthood.
    They finally achieve nothing except loneliness, getting no honour after sex, becoming objects to be used and then trashed whether it is office, industry or bed, anything can only be regarded to be honoured when it is applauded, contracted and have served a purpose for a prosperous society.
    After 1st and 2nd WW women were brought into industries, offices etc just to make up the shortage of men so that productivity & profitability may be obtained & sustained. They were, are and will never be indispensable for keeping the revenue engine running. They did not , do not or will never contribute in creating, innovating or devising something new.

  3. I know the reaction would come from these feminists and other so-called progressive mindsets with no reasoning no logic and rationale and I am used to it. I do not care it at all. Honestly and frankly speaking, I am happy with this situation, it is approaching a complete irreparable perpetual collapse. I am waiting for that collapse very eagerly which somehow now has started. After this collapse Islam and Ahmadiyya will take over Inshallah to replace the vacuum and we should be ready for this in near future.

  4. It is said that “qayamah” will happen on the wicked people. God forbid it may not be this time. Because the world in general has fallen very low in morals.

  5. It makes me feel very uncomfortable to read criticisms that say women have become selfish and self centered, when in fact, they were shoved into this lifestyle, as pointed by one post, after the World War I & II to keep the industry and economy going.

    Now, they are expected by the society to put their kids in daycare and work outside the home so that their family can have a bigger house/car/vacations etc. They are also expected to look after the household and the kids more than the men, while they work 9-5 like men.

    This is bound to create resentment and I’m not surprised women end up shunning a traditional married life since it puts them in extra hardship.

    But giving up marriage is not a solution for women either because they are biologically built to have children and the desire to have children…and postponing childbirth to later years also has a lot of health risks for the mother and the child…and she still ends up taking care of the child alone or with very little support…and ends up in a worse off situation then men who postpone having a family.

    Islamic marriage is the only solution that works with human nature, where it is not just the duty but the right of the woman to stay at home and raise her kids and be provided for, and if circumstances permit and she wants she can engage in professional and educational activities as well. Her husband has the duty to provide for the household and her comfort and thus has the right to expect her to take care of the home and children, but he has no right on her to spend on him from her earned or inherited wealth.

    In fact at the time of the Holy Prophet (pbuh) a women came and inquired that she wanted to spend in charity and that her husband was poor, so would she get reward for charity if she spent on her husband. The Holy Prophet (pbuh) said she would get twice the reward, one for spending in charity and the other for taking care of one’s relatives.

    This society also realized men and women are different enough to be assigned different and specialized roles by nature but to acknowledge it in so many words does not fit the version of equality they have created just to make women keep on working outside the homes…men have gotten used to women’s labor, be it on the national scale or domestic…and so women are trapped in this unfair system built around the rhetoric of “equality.”

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