Interfaith marriages: Why the taboo?

Source: ET

As the cliché goes – love is blind; blind even to religious differences.

Ava and Neil made a great pair. It’s rare to come across a couple so compatible and in tune with each other. They complemented each other perfectly. Spending time with them was always a pleasure; there was never a dull moment with them around. Those two were the life of any gathering they attended.

We spent many a year painting the town red, indulging in mischief and being what we were – a group of youngsters living it up and doing the things the young the world over do.

Their love blossomed as the years wore on. After settling down in their respective careers, Ava and Neil decided it was time to culminate their relationship into marriage. Somewhere in the recesses of my mind, I had always known that the couple had a long struggle ahead of them but I had never fathomed that the future would pan out so differently than we’d imagined.  You see, Neil and Ava practised different religions.

As expected, both sets of parents objected to their wedding. A drama ensued – tears were shed, attempts were made at emotionally blackmailing the pair and as I’d feared, they were pried apart.

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5 replies

  1. I think the Holy Qur’an and the Holy Prophet Muhammad(saw)are clear on the subject of marriage of people who don’t your faith.The Holy Qur’an ch. 2:222 says: “And marry not idolatrous women until they believe; even a believing bond-woman is better than the idolatress, although she may highly please you. And give not believing women in marriage to idolaters until they believe; even a believing is better than an idolater, although he may highly please you. These call to the fire but Allah calls to Heaven and to forgiveness by His command. And He makes his signs clear to the people that they may remember.”
    This is a clear instruction from Allah to the believers. There is no compromise at all.
    The Holy Prophet is also reported to have said that among all the considerations one must look for in marrying someone, The most important to consider first is the person’s faith(Taqwa).
    This means that if you are a Muslim, you must marry a Mulsim.
    No one( whether male or female Muslim) is permitted to marry a non-Muslim, period.
    If the the Muslim females feel their number is more than the Muslim men, the solution is also in the Qur’an where polygamy is allowed by Allah. The Muslim men should be encouraged to sacrifice marrying more than one to enable our Muslim sisters to get husbands within the faith. The Holy Prophet is the best example for us as Muslims.
    May Allah protect us. Amin.

  2. Islamic teachings are comprehensive, insightful and enriched with wisdom. Muslims men can only marry Muslim women or women from people of book only and only if they exhibit piety and the intention is also to seek such women. While Muslim women can only marry Muslim men.This is admonished by Allah but everyone is free to seek his or her own will no bar.

    Even those couples who claim not to live without each other & be liberal but restrain to their religions most positively (not less than 95%) end up, fall out or breakup when choice of their children is mattered. Each one wants their children to follow their religion. Yes it is possible to have a solution but only when religion is a secondary thing or not among those which are in priority; subsequently they do not even adhere to their religions.

  3. My dear friends, I’m aware of what you are saying. But it is not everything that permitted that is good for you as a believer. Of course you can be permitted to pork under certain conditions. So is marriage. Marriage is so important regarding the future of your children.
    Let consider what Allah has in ch 5:52 “O ye who believe! take not the Jews and the Christians for friends. They are friends of each other. Whoso among you takes them for friends is indeed one of them. Verily, Allah loves not the unjust people.”
    This doesn’t mean you should hate. If Allah is warning believers not to take them for friends, how would you consider taking them as wives or husbands. Think about it.
    Consider ch 5:56,57&58 too.
    “Your friend is Allah, His Messenger and the believers who observe prayer and pay the zakat and worship God alone.
    57. And those who take Allah and His Messenger and the believers for friends should rest assured that it is the party that must triumph.
    58. O ye who believe! take not for friends who make a jest of your and sport of your religion from among those who were given the book before you and the disbelievers. And fear Allah if you are believers.”
    So my brothers, ponder over these if it is appropriate for a Muslim to marry a non-Muslim and remains a good Muslim, in the light of the above verses.

  4. Okay I’m going to have to get in on this.
    It is makrooh (disliked) for a Muslim man to marry a Christian or Jew (of which they must be chaste and from an Islamic country). Evidence for this is when the rightly guided Khalifa, Umar, banned interfaith marriages.

    On the other hand, Muslim women are banned from marrying outside their faith. Verse 60:12 forbids such marriages.

    Also to the person who quoted the verse about not taking Christian and jewish friends, tafsir and ijma has indicated that this verse was for the enemies of the ummah. It does not apply to all Christians and jews.

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