The success of the Brexit negotiations show that we’re finally getting our country back

Proper British jobs such as knight, chimney sweep, coming 26th in Eurovision and weeing in a foreign fountain will be reserved for BRITISH workers

They don’t know how it’s going to work or when it will start or who will be allowed here, but the leaked Brexit papers show at last they’re going to STOP THE IMMIGRANTS from doing all those jobs they do. So we can walk past a field in Hereford with tons of rotting apples no one has picked and be PROUD because we’ll be certain no Pole has been picking them off trees, so they can lie on the ground rotting like PROPER BRITISH apples full of BRITISH MAGGOTS because we’ve GOT OUR COUNTRY BACK.

And half the staff in London restaurants are from the EU, but now we can look forward to going out to eat, fetching an empty plate from the kitchen and enjoying an ENGLISH meal, that isn’t cooked or prepared and doesn’t consist of any food so we can look out of the window for an hour and then leave because we’ve got SOVEREIGNTY.

We can lie on hospital trolleys singing the National Anthem between screams, enjoying the freedom of knowing none of our taxes are going towards foreign nurses so we can stick a Union Jack in our open wound as it turns septic, shedding tears of happiness because we’re in charge of our affairs again.


Categories: Europe, Europe and Australia, European Union, UK

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