Attraction can be a seemingly complex topic. Just what is it exactly what makes someone attractive? Why do certain people find certain things attractive, while other people don’t? How important is attraction in the realm of relationships – do you get to know someone til they become attractive, or do you need something there first? What happens when you are no longer drawn to someone? The laws of attraction can be quite complex with a lot of layers.
When it comes to defining a woman as attractive, the first topic that comes up is usually their physical appearance. A lot of women certainly feel that pressure. I think of whenever I hear people talk about Hugh Jackman and his wife, and the conversation usually goes down the path, “how can someone so attractive be with someone so physically average?”. I personally don’t hold that same view or perspective, but I bring it up just as an example of where the topic of attraction is usually going.
But there are far more qualities in a person that can make them attractive.
One of my favourite things to sit and listen to is the sound of my married or dating male friends, or even single friends about someone they admire, speaking about all the things they find attractive about a woman they care about. It’s often shocking for women who may hear the comments being made, and they are so taken back to think “wow, I didn’t actually know that guys valued those things”.
This is a list of those attractive qualities that go way too underrated, but many guys I know find very attractive. I personally know a lot of women who fit the bill on all of these categories, and this isn’t so much a list of what to aspire to as it is a celebration of what a lot of guys actually value.
A listening ear
I wrote a post a while ago about some of my observations of being a third wheel for a number of my friends. One of the things I would’ve liked to talk more about, and I will do so here, is watching the transition occur in my male friends’ lives as their relationship develops. Where once when they had problems it was either a struggle to face different issues in their lives and a big effort to reach out and be open and honest with us guys, it is always a beautiful thing to start hearing “well, I talked to my wife about it, and she was able to give me some great perspective and hear me out”.